Years ago at an interfaith conference in Europe, I was asked to speak about the lives of Western nuns. Thinking that people would not
be interested in what was ordinary life for me, I instead gave a Dharma talk
about how we trained our minds in love and compassion. Afterwards, several
people came up to me and said, "Your talk was very nice, but we really
wanted to hear about the lives of the Western nuns! How do you live? What are
your problems and joys?" Sometimes it is difficult to discuss this: when
speaking about the problems, there is the risk of complaining or of others
thinking we are complaining; when speaking about the joys, there is the risk of
being too buoyant or of others perceiving us as arrogant. In any case, let me
say that I will speak in general statements from the viewpoint of being
ordained in the Tibetan tradition -- in other words, what is written here is
not universal to all Western Buddhist nuns. And now I will plunge in and talk
about the experiences of we Western nuns.
Plunge in…..that's what most of us did. The Dharma spoke deeply to
our hearts, and so, counter to all expectations of our cultures and our
families, we quit our jobs, parted from our dear ones, were ordained as Buddhist
nuns and in many cases, went to live in other countries. Who would take such
radical steps in order to practice the Dharma? How are we unlike the Asian
women who are ordained?
In general, Asian women receive ordination when they are young,
malleable girls with little life experience, or when their families are grown,
they are elderly and seek life in a monastery for its spiritual and/or physical
comforts. On the other hand, most Western nuns are ordained as adults. They are
educated, have careers, and many have had families and children. They bring
their talents and skills to the monastery, and they also bring their habits and
expectations that have been well polished through years of interactions in the
world. When Asian women are ordained, their families and communities support
them. Becoming a nun is socially acceptable and respectable. In addition, Asian
cultures focus more on group than individual identity, so it is comparatively
easy for the newly-ordained to adapt to community life in a monastery. As
children, they shared bedrooms with their siblings. They were taught to place
the welfare of their family about their own and to respect and defer to their
parents and teachers. Western nuns, on the other hand, grew up in a culture
that stresses the individual over the group, and they therefore tend to be
individualistic. Western women have to have strong personalities to become
Buddhist nuns: their families reproach them for relinquishing a well-paying job
and not having children; Western society brands them as parasites who don't
want to work because they are lazy; and Western culture accuses them of
repressing their sexuality and avoiding intimate relationships. A Western woman
who cares about what others think about her is not going to become a Buddhist
nun. She is thus more likely to be self-sufficient and self-motivated. These
qualities, while in general good, can be carried to an extreme, sometimes
making it more difficult for these highly-individualistic nuns to live together
in community.
That is, if there were a community to live in. As first generation
Western Buddhist nuns, we indeed lead the homeless life. There are very few
monasteries in the West, and if we want to stay in one, we generally have to
pay to do so because the community has no money. That presents some challenges:
how does someone with monastic precepts, which include wearing robes, shaving
one's head, not handling money, and not doing business, earn money?
Many Westerners assume that there is an umbrella institution,
similar to the Catholic Church, that looks over us. This is not the case. Our
Tibetan teachers do not provide for us financially and in many cases ask us to
raise money to support their Tibetan monk disciples who are refugees in India.
Some Western nuns have savings that are rapidly consumed, others have kind
friends and family who sponsor them, and still others are forced by conditions
to put on lay clothes and get a job in the city. This makes keeping the
ordination precepts difficult and prevents them from studying and practicing
intensely, which is the main purpose for which they were ordained.
How does one then receive monastic training and education? Some
Western nuns opt to stay in Asia for as long as they can. But there too they
face visa problems and language problems. Tibetan nunneries are generally
overcrowded, and there is no room for foreigners unless one wants to pay to
live in a guestroom. Tibetan nuns do rituals and receive teachings in the
Tibetan language, their education beginning with memorizing texts. The majority
of Western nuns, however, does not speak Tibetan and needs an English
translation to receive teachings. In addition, memorizing texts in Tibetan is
generally not meaningful to them. They seek to learn the meaning of the
teachings and how to practice them. They want to learn meditation and to
experience the Dharma. While the Tibetan nuns grew up with Buddhism in their
families and culture since childhood, the Western nuns are learning a new faith
and thus have different questions and issues. For example, while a Tibetan nun
takes the existence of the Three Jewels for granted, a Western nuns wants to
know exactly what the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha are and how to know they
actually exist. Therefore, even in India, the Western nuns do not fit into the
established Tibetan religious institutions.
Many Western nuns are sent to work in Dharma centers in the West,
where they receive room, board, and a tiny stipend for personal needs in return
for working for the center. Although here they can receive teachings in their
own language, for the newly-ordained, life in Dharma centers can be difficult
because they live amongst lay people. The curriculum in the center is designed
for the lay students and the resident lama, if there is one, is usually too
busy with the lay community to train the one or two Western monastics who live
there.
Transforming Difficulties into the Path
Difficulties such as those described above are also challenges for
practice. To remain a nun, a Western woman needs to implement the Buddha's
teachings in order to make her mind happy in whatever circumstances she finds
herself. She has to meditate deeply on impermanence and death so that she can
be comfortable with financial insecurity. She has to contemplate the
disadvantages of attachment to the eight worldly concerns so that praise and
blame from others do not affect her mind. She must reflect on karma and its
effects to accept the difficulties she encounters in receiving an education.
And she needs to generate the altruistic heart that wishes to remedy these
situations so that others do not have to encounter them in the future. Thus,
her difficulties are the catalyst for her practice, and through practice her
mind is transformed and becomes peaceful.
One of the biggest challenges is to live as a celibate in the
West, where sexuality spills from the soap boxes and the soap operas. How can
one be emotionally happy when the media and societal values pronounces romantic
relationships as the be-all of life? Again, practice is the secret. To keep our
precepts, we have to look beyond superficial appearances; we have to understand
deeply the ingrained emotional and sexual patterns of attachment that keep us
imprisoned in cyclic existence. We must understand the nature of our emotions
and learn to deal with them in constructive ways without depending on others to
comfort us or make us feel good about ourselves.
People wonder if we see our families and our old friends and if we
miss them. Buddhist nuns are not cloistered. We can visit our families and
friends. We do not stop caring for others simply because we are ordained.
However, we do try to transform the type of affection we have for them. For
ordinary people in worldly life, affection leads to clinging attachment, an
emotion that exaggerates the good qualities of someone and then wishes not to
be separated from him or her. This attitude breeds partiality, wishing to help
only our dear ones, harm the people we don't like, and ignore the multitudes of
beings we don't know.
As monastics, we have to work strongly with this tendency, using
the meditations on equanimity, love, compassion, and joy to expand our hearts
so that we see all beings as loveable. The more we gradually train our mind in
this way, the less we miss our dear ones and the more we feel close to all
others simply because they are sentient beings who want happiness and do not
want suffering as intensely as we do. This open-hearted feeling does not mean
we don't cherish our parents. To the contrary, the meditations on the kindness
of our parents open our eyes to all that they did for us. However, rather than
be attached only to them, we endeavor to extend the feeling of love to all
others as well. Great internal satisfaction arises as we develop more
equanimity and open our hearts to cherish all other beings. Here, too, we see
what seems to be a difficulty -- not living in close contact with our family
and old friends -- to be a factor that stimulates spiritual growth when we
apply our Dharma practice to it.
Some conditions that may initially seem detrimental can also be
advantageous. For example, Western nuns are not an integral part of the Tibetan
religious establishment, whose hierarchy consists of Tibetan monks. Although
this does have its disadvantages, it also has given us greater freedom in
guiding our practice. For example, the bhikshuni or full ordination for women
never spread to Tibet due to the difficulties of having the required number of
bhikshunis travel across the Himalayan Mountains in previous centuries. The novice
ordination for women does exist in the Tibetan tradition and is given by the
monks. Although several Tibetan monks, including the Dalai Lama, approve of
nuns in the Tibetan tradition receiving bhikshuni ordination from Chinese
monastics, the Tibetan religious establishment has not officially sanctioned
this. In recent years, several Western women have gone to receive the bhikshuni
ordination in the Chinese and Vietnamese traditions where it is extant. Because
they are part of the Tibetan community and more liable to its social pressure,
it is much more difficult for Tibetan nuns to do this. In this way, not being
an integral part of the system has its advantages for the Western nuns!
Receiving Ordination
In order to receive ordination as a Buddhist nun, a woman must
have a good general understanding of the Buddha's teachings and a strong,
stable motivation to be free from cyclic existence and attain liberation. Then
she must request ordination from her teacher. In the Tibetan tradition, most
teachers are monks, although some are lay men. There are very few women
teachers in our tradition at present. If the teacher agrees, he will arrange
the ordination ceremony, which in the case of the sramanerika or novice
ordination, lasts a few hours. If a novice nun in the Tibetan tradition later
wants to receive the bhikshuni ordination, she must find a preceptor in the
Chinese, Korean, or Vietnamese tradition. She then must travel to a place where
the ordination ceremony will be held, and go through a training program which
last from one week to one month before the actual ceremony. In my case, I
received the novice ordination in Dharamsala, India, in 1977, and nine years
later went to Taiwan to receive the bhikshuni ordination. Going through the
one-month training program in Chinese was a challenge, and after two weeks, the
other Western nun and I were delighted when the preceptor allowed another nun
to translate for us during some of the classes. However, the experience of
training as a nun in both the Tibetan and Chinese traditions has enriched my
practice and helped me to see the Dharma in all the Buddhist traditions despite
the externally diverse, culturally conditioned forms that each uses.
After ordination, we need to receive training in the precepts if
we are to keep them well. A new nun should request one of her teachers to give
her teachings on the meaning of each precept, what constitutes a transgression
and how to purify transgressions should they occur. While a Western nun can
usually receive teachings on the precepts without too much difficulty, due to
the lack of monasteries for Western nuns, she often misses out on the practical
training that comes through living with other nuns in community.
As a nun, our first responsibility is to live according to our precepts
as best as we can. Precepts are not a heavy burden, but a joy. In other words,
they are voluntarily taken on because we know they will help us in our
spiritual pursuit. Precepts liberate us from acting in harmful, dysfunctional,
and inconsiderate ways. Novice nuns have ten precepts, which can be subdivided
to make 36, probationary nuns have six precepts in addition to these, and fully
ordained nuns (bhikshunis) have 348 precepts as listed in the Dharmagupta
school of Vinaya, which is the only extant bhikshuni lineage today. The
precepts are divided into various categories, each with its corresponding
method to deal with transgressions. The root precepts are the most serious and
must be kept purely in order to remain as a nun. These entail avoiding killing,
stealing, sexual contact, lying about spiritual attainments, and so forth. If
these are broken in a complete fashion, one is no longer a nun. Other precepts
deal with the nuns' relationships with each other, with monks, and with the lay
community. Still others address how we conduct ourselves in daily activities
such as eating, walking, dressing, and residing in a place. Infractions of
these are purified in various ways according to their severity: it may entail
confession to another bhikshuni, confession in the presence of the assembly of
bhikshunis, or relinquishment of a possession obtained in excess or in an
inappropriate way, and so forth.
Keeping the precepts in the West in the twentieth century can be a
challenge. The precepts were established by the Buddha during his life in India
in the 6th century B.C.E., in a culture and time clearly different from our
own. While nuns in some Buddhist traditions, for example the Theravada, try to
keep the precepts literally, others come from traditions that allow more
leeway. By studying the Vinaya and knowing the stories of the specific events
that prompted the Buddha to establish each precept, nuns will come to
understand the purpose of each precept. Then, they will know how to adhere to
its purpose although they may not be able to follow it literally. For example,
one of the bhikshuni precepts is not to ride in a vehicle. If we followed that
literally, it would be difficult to go to receive or to give teachings, let
alone to live as a nun in a city. In ancient India, vehicles were drawn by
animals or human beings, and riding in them was reserved for the wealthy. The
Buddha's concern when he made this precept was for nuns to avoid causing
suffering to others or generating arrogance. To adapt that to modern societies,
nuns should try not to ride in expensive vehicles and avoid becoming proud if
someone drives them somewhere in a nice car. In this way, the nuns must learn
about the precepts and traditional monastic life style, and then adapt it to
the conditions they live in.
Of course, there will be differences of interpretation and
implementation among traditions, monasteries in the same tradition, and
individuals within a monastery. We need to be tolerant of these differences and
to use them to motivate us to reflect deeper on the precepts. For example,
Asian nuns generally do not shake hands with men, while most Western nuns in
the Tibetan tradition do. If they do this simply to conform to Western customs,
I do not see a problem. However, each nun must be mindful so that attraction
and attachment do not arise when she shakes hands. Such variations in observing
the precepts can be accepted due to cultural differences, etiquette and habit
in different countries.
Daily Life
The precepts form a framework for further Dharma practice. As
nuns, we therefore want to study and practice the Buddha's teachings and share
them with others as much as possible. We also do practical work to sustain
ourselves and benefit others. Western nuns live in a variety of circumstances:
sometimes in community -- a monastery or a Dharma center -- and sometimes
alone. In all of these situations, our day begins with prayers and meditation
before breakfast. After that, we go about our daily activities. In the evening
we again meditate and do our spiritual practices. Sometimes it can be a
challenge to fit several hours of meditation practice into a busy schedule. But
since meditation and prayers are what sustains us, we make strong efforts to
navigate the demands made on our time. When the work at a Dharma center is
especially intense or many people need our help, it is tempting to take the
time out of our practice. However, doing that exacts a toll and if done for too
long, can make keeping ordination difficult. Thus, each year we try to take a
few weeks -- or months if possible -- out of our busy lives to do meditation
retreat in order to deepen our practice.
As Western nuns we encounter a variety of interesting events in
daily life. Some people recognize the robes and know we are Buddhist nuns,
others do not. Wearing my robes in the city, I have had people come up to me
and compliment me on my "outfit." Once a flight attendant on a plane
leaned over and said, "Not everyone can wear her hair like that, but that
cut looks great on you!" A child in a park opened his eyes wide in
amazement and said to his mother, "Look Mommy, that lady doesn't have any
hair!" In a store, a stranger approached a nun and in a conciliatory way
said, "Don't worry, dear. After the chemo is finished your hair will grow
back again."
When we walk on the street, occasionally someone will say
"Hare Krishna." I have also had people come up and say, "Have
faith in Jesus!" Some people look delighted and ask if I know the Dalai
Lama, how they can learn to meditate, or where a Buddhist center is in the
town. In the frenzy of American life, they are inspired to see someone who
represents spiritual life. After a series of glitches on an airline trip, a
fellow passenger approached me and said, "Your calmness and smile me
helped me get through all these hassles. Thank you for your meditation
practice."
Even in Buddhist communities, we are treated in a variety of ways
because Buddhism is new in the West and people do not know how to relate to
monastics. Some people are very respectful to Asian monastics and eager to
serve them, but see Western monastics as unpaid labor for the Dharma center and
immediately set us to work running errands, cooking, and cleaning for the lay
community. Other people appreciate all monastics and are very courteous.
Western nuns never know when we go somewhere how others will treat us. At times
this can be disquieting, but in the long-run it makes us more flexible and
helps us to overcome attachment to reputation. We use such situations to let go
of attachment to being treated well and aversion to being treated poorly. Yet,
for the sake of the Dharma and the Sangha, we sometimes have to politely
instruct people on the proper way to act around monastics. For example, I had
to remind members of a Dharma center that invited me to their city to teach
that it is not appropriate to put me up at the home of a single man (especially
since this one had a huge poster of a Playboy bunny in his bathroom!). In
another instance, a young couple was travelling with a group of nuns and we had
to remind them that it is not appropriate to embrace and kiss each other on the
bus with us. As a young nun, such events annoyed me, but now, due to the
benefits of Dharma practice, I am able to react with humor and patience.
The Role of the Sangha in the West
The word "sangha" is used in a variety of ways. When we
speak of the Three Jewels of refuge, the Sangha Jewel refers to any individual
-- lay or monastic -- who has realized emptiness of inherent existence
directly. This unmistaken realization of reality renders such a person a
reliable object of refuge. The conventional sangha is a group of four or more fully
ordained monastics. In traditional Buddhist societies, this is the meaning of
the term "sangha," and an individual monastic is a sangha member. The
sangha members and the sangha community are respected not because the
individuals are special in and of themselves, but because they hold the
precepts given by the Buddha. Their primary objective in life is to tame their
minds by applying these precepts and the Buddha's teachings.
In the West, people often use the word "sangha" loosely
to refer to any one who frequents a Buddhist center. This person may or may not
have taken even the five lay precepts, to abandon killing, stealing, unwise
sexual behavior, lying, and intoxicants. Using "sangha" in this
all-encompassing way can lead to misinterpretation and confusion. I believe it
is better to stick to the traditional usage.
Individual nuns vary considerably, and any discussion of the role
of the sangha has to take this into account. Because Buddhism is new in the
West, some people receive ordination without sufficient preparation. Others
later find that the monastic life style is not suitable for them, give back
their vows, and return to lay life. Some nuns are not mindful or have strong
disturbing attitudes and cannot observe the precepts well. It is clear that not
everyone who is a Buddhist nun is a Buddha! In discussing the role of the
sangha, therefore, we are considering those who are happy as monastics, work
hard to apply the Dharma to counteract their disturbing attitudes and negative
behavior, and are likely to remain monastics for the duration of their lives.
Some Westerners doubt the usefulness of sangha. Until the
political turmoil of the twentieth century, the sangha were by-and-large among
the educated members of many Asian societies. Although individual sangha
members came from all classes of society, everyone received a religious
education once he or she is ordained. One aspect of the sangha's role was to
study and preserve the Buddha's teachings for future generations. Now in the
West, most everyone is literate and can study the Dharma. University professors
and scholars in particular study the Buddha's teachings and give lectures on
Buddhism. In previous times, it was the sangha that had the time to do long
meditation retreats in order to actualize the meaning of the Dharma. Now in the
West, some lay people take months or years off of work in order to do long
meditation retreats. Thus, because of the changes in society, now lay people
can study the Dharma and do long retreats, just as the monastics do. This makes
them wonder, "What is the use of monastics? Why can't we be considered the
modern sangha?"
Having lived part of my life as a lay person and part as a sangha
member, my experience tells me that there is a difference between the two. Even
though some lay people do the traditional work of the sangha -- and some may do
it better than some monastics -- there is nevertheless a difference between a
person who lives with many ethical precepts (a fully-ordained nun, or bhikshuni
has 348 precepts) and another who does not. The precepts put us right up
against our old habits and emotional patterns. A lay retreatant who tires of
the austerity of retreat can bring her retreat to a close, get a job, and
resume a comfortable life style with beautiful possessions. A university
professor may make herself attractive. She may also receive part of her
identity by being in relationship to her husband or partner. If she does not
already have a partner who gives her emotional support, that option is open to
her. She blends in, that is, she can teach Buddhist principles, but when she is
in society, no one recognizes her as a Buddhist, let alone as a religious
person. She does not represent the Dharma in public, and thus it is easier for
her behavior to be less than exemplary. If she has many possessions, an
expensive car, attractive clothes, and goes on holiday to a beach resort where
she lies on the beach to get tan, no one thinks twice about it. If she boasts
about her successes and blames others when her plans do not work out, her
behavior does not stand out. In other words, her attachment to sense pleasures,
praise, and reputation are seen as normal and may easily go unchallenged either
by herself or by others.
For a nun, however, the scenario is quite different. She wears
robes and shaves her head so she and everyone else around her know that she
aspires to live according to certain precepts. This aids her tremendously in
dealing with attachments and aversions as they arise in daily life. Men know
that she is celibate and relate to her differently. Both she and the men she
meets do not become involved in the subtle flirting, games, and self-conscious
behavior that people engage in when sexually attracted to another. A nun does
not have to think about what to wear or how she looks. The robes and shaved
head help her to cut through such attachments. They bring a certain anonymity
and equality when she lives together with other monastics, for no one can draw
special attention to herself due to her appearance. The robes and the precepts
make her much more aware of her actions, or karma, and their results. She has
put much time and energy into reflecting on her potential and aspiring to
think, feel, speak, and act in ways that benefit herself and others. Thus, even
when she is alone, the power of the precepts makes her more mindful not to act
in unethical or impulsive ways. If she acts inappropriately with others, her
teacher, other nuns, and lay people immediately comment on it. Holding monastic
precepts has a pervasive beneficial effect on one's life that may not be easily
comprehensible to those who have not had the experience. There is a significant
difference between the life styles of Buddhist scholars and lay retreatants on
one hand, and monastics on the other. A new nun, who had been a dedicated and
knowledgeable lay practitioner for years, told me that before ordination she
did not understand how one could feel or act differently simply because of
being nun. However, after ordination she was surprised at the power of the
ordination: her internal sense of being a practitioner and her awareness of her
behavior had changed considerably because of it.
Some people associate monasticism with austerity and self-centered
spiritual practice. Contrasting this with the bodhisattva practice of
benefiting other beings, they say that monastic life is unnecessary because the
bodhisattva path, which can be followed as a lay practitioner, is higher. In
fact, there is not a split between being a monastic and being a bodhisattva. In
fact, they can easily go together. By regulating our physical and verbal
actions, monastic precepts increase our mindfulness of what we say and do. This
in turn makes us look at the mental attitudes and emotions that motivate us to
speak and act. In doing this, our gross misbehavior is curbed as are the
attachment, anger, and confusion that motivate them. With this as a basis, we
can cultivate the heart that cherishes others, wishes to work for their
benefit, and aspires to become a Buddha in order to be able to do so most
effectively. Thus, the monastic life style is a helpful foundation for the
bodhisattva path.
The Contributions of Western Nuns
Many people in the West, particularly those from Protestant
cultures, have preconceived ideas of monastics as people who withdraw from
society and do not contribute to its betterment. They think monastics are
escapists who cannot face the difficulties of ordinary life. My experiences and
observations have not validated any of these preconceptions. The fundamental
cause of our problems is not the external circumstances, but our internal
mental states -- the disturbing attitudes of clinging attachment, anger, and
confusion. These do not vanish by shaving the head, putting on monastic robes,
and going to live in a monastery. If it were so easy to be free of anger, then
wouldn't everyone take ordination right away? Until we eliminate them through
spiritual practice, these disturbing attitudes follow us wherever we go. Thus,
living as a nun is not a way to avoid or escape problems. Rather, it makes us
look at ourselves for we can no longer engage in distractions as shopping,
entertainment, alcohol, and intoxicants. Monastics are committed to eliminating
the root causes of suffering in their own minds and in showing others how to do
the same.
Although they try to spend the majority of their time in study and
practice, monastics offer valuable contributions to society. Like monastics of
all spiritual traditions, Western Buddhist nuns demonstrate a life of
simplicity and purity to society. By avoiding consumerism -- both the clutter
of many possessions and the mentality of greed that consumerism fosters -- nuns
show that it is indeed possible to live simply and be content with what one
has. Second, in curtailing their consumerist tendencies, they safeguard the
environment for future generations. And third, as celibates, they practice
birth control (as well as rebirth control) and thus help stop overpopulation!
By taming their own "monkey minds," nuns can show other
people the methods to do so. As others practice, their lives will be happier
and their marriages better. They will be less stressed and angry. Teaching the
Buddha's techniques for subduing disturbing emotions within oneself and for
resolving conflicts with others is an invaluable contribution that the nuns can
make to society.
Because they are Westerners who have immersed themselves in the
Dharma completely, the nuns are cultural bridges between East and West. Often
they have lived in multiple cultures and can not only translate from one
language to another but also from one set of cultural concepts and norms to
another. In bringing Buddhism to the West and engaging in the on-going process
of differentiating the Dharma from its Asian cultural forms, they provide
invaluable help along the path to those interested in the Buddha's teachings.
They can also help Westerners to recognize their own cultural preconceptions
that block correctly understanding or practicing the Dharma. The nuns are able
to speak to diverse audiences and communicate well with all of them, from
American high school students to Asian senior citizens.
As Westerners, these nuns are not bound by certain pressures
within Asian societies. For example, we can easily receive teachings from a
variety of masters of different Buddhist traditions. We are not bound by
centuries-old misconceptions about other traditions, nor do we face social
pressure to be loyal to the Buddhist tradition of our own country in the same
way that many Asian nuns are. This gives us tremendous latitude in our
education and enables us to adopt the best from various Buddhist traditions
into our life style. This enhances our abilities to teach others and to promote
dialogue and harmony among various Buddhist traditions.
The Western nuns offer many skills to the Buddhist community. Some
are Dharma teachers; others translate both oral and written teachings. A number
of nuns have engaged in long meditation retreats, serving society through their
example and their practice. Some nuns are counselors who help Dharma students
work through the difficulties that arise in practice. Many people, particularly
women, feel more comfortable discussing emotional or personal issues with a nun
rather than a monk. Other nuns work in day-care centers, in hospices with the
terminally ill, or in refugee communities in their own countries and abroad.
Some nuns are artists, others writers, therapists, or professors at
universities. Many nuns work in the background: they are the crucial but unseen
workers whose selfless labor enables Dharma centers and their resident teachers
to serve the public.
The nuns also offer an alternative version of women's liberation.
Nowadays some Buddhist women say that associating women with sexuality, the
body, sensuality, and the earth denigrates women. Their remedy is to say that
the body, sensuality, and the ability to give birth to children are good. As
philosophical support, they speak of tantric Buddhism which trains one to
transform sense pleasures into the path. Regardless of whether they are
actually able to transform sensuality into the path or not, these women
maintain the paradigm that women are associated with sensuality. Nuns offer a
different view. As nuns, we do not exalt the body and sensuality, nor do we
disparage them. The human body is simply a vehicle with which we practice the
Dharma. It doesn't have to be judged as good or bad. It is just seen as it is
and related to accordingly. Human beings are sexual beings, but we are also
much more than that. In essence, nuns stop making a big deal out of sex.
Western nuns also have the opportunity to be very creative in
their practice and in setting up institutions that reflect an effective way to
live a Dharma life in the West. Because they are Western, they are not subject
to many of the social pressures and ingrained self-concepts that many Asian
nuns must deal with. On the other hand, because they are trained in the Dharma
and have often lived in Asian cultures, they are faithful to the purity of the
tradition. This prevents them from "throwing the Buddha out with the bath
water" when distinguishing the Dharma to bring to the West from the Asian
cultural practices that do not necessarily apply to Western practitioners. In
this way, nuns are not seeking to change Buddhism, but to be changed by it! The
essence of the Dharma cannot be changed and should not be tampered with.
Buddhist institutions, however, are created by human beings and reflect the
cultures in which they are found. As Western nuns, we can change the form that
these Buddhism institutions take in our society.
Prejudice and Pride
People often ask if we face discrimination because we are women.
Of course! Most societies in our world are male-oriented, and Buddhist ones are
no exception. For example, to avoid sexual attraction that is a distraction to
our Dharma practice, monks and nuns are housed and seated separately. Since
males have traditionally been the leaders in most societies and because monks
are more numerous than nuns, the monks generally receive the preferable seats
and living quarters. In Tibetan society, the monks receive a better education
and more respect from society. There is also a scarcity of ordained female role
models. The public -- including many Western women -- generally give larger
donations to monks than to nuns. Traditionally the sangha has received their
material requisites -- food, shelter, clothing, and medicine -- through
donations from the public. When these are lacking, the nuns find it more
difficult to receive proper training and education because they cannot cover
the expenses those entail and because they must spend their time, not in study
and practice, but in finding alternative means of income.
As Western nuns, we face similar external circumstances.
Nevertheless, Western nuns are generally self-confident and assertive. Thus, we
are apt to take advance of situations that present themselves. Due to the
relatively small number of Western monks and nuns, we are trained and receive
teachings together. Thus the Western nuns receive the same education as Western
monks, and our teachers give us equal responsibilities. Nevertheless, when
participating in Asian Dharma events, we are not treated the same as men.
Interestingly, Asians often do not notice this. It is so much "the way
things are done" that it is never questioned. Sometimes people ask me to
discuss at length how nuns in general, and Western nuns in particular, face
discrimination. However, I do not find this particularly useful. For me, it is
sufficient to be aware in various situations, understand the cultural roots and
habits for the discrimination, and thus not let it affect my self-confidence.
Then I try to deal with the situation in a beneficial way. Sometimes this is by
politely questioning a situation. Other times it is by first winning someone's
confidence and respect over time, and later pointing out difficulties. However,
in all situations, it necessitates maintaining a kind attitude in my own mind.
Many years ago, I would become angry when encountering gender
prejudice, particularly in Asian Buddhist institutions. For example, I was once
attending a large "tsog" offering ceremony in Dharamsala, India. I
watched three Tibetan monks stand up and present a large food offering to His
Holiness the Dalai Lama. Other monks then rose to distribute offerings to the
entire congregation. Inside I fumed, "The monks always do these important
functions and we nuns have to sit here! It's not fair." Then I considered
that if we nuns had to get up to make the offering to His Holiness and distribute
offerings to the crowd, I would complain that we had to do all the work while
the monks remained seated. Noticing this, I saw that both the problem and the
solution to it lay in my attitude, not in the external situation.
Being a Dharma practitioner, I could not escape the fact that
anger is a defilement that misconstrues a situation and is therefore a cause of
suffering. I had to face my anger and my arrogance, and apply the Dharma
antidotes to deal with them. Now it is actually intriguing and fun to deal with
feeling offended. I observe the sense of "I" that feels offended, the
I who wants to retaliate. I pause and examine, "Who is this I?" Or I
stop and reflect, "How is my mind viewing this situation and creating my
experience by the way I interpret it?" Some people think that if a woman
relinquishes her anger and pride in such circumstances, she must see herself as
inferior and will not work to remedy the situation. This is not a correct
understanding of the Dharma, however; for only when our own mind is peaceful
can we clearly see methods to improve bad circumstances.
Some people claim that the fact that fully ordained nuns have more
precepts than monks indicates gender discrimination. They disapprove of the
fact that some precepts which are minor transgressions for monks are major ones
for nuns. Understanding the evolution of the precepts puts this is proper
perspective. When the sangha was initially formed, there were no precepts.
After several years, some monks acted in ways that provoked criticism either
from other monastics or from the general public. In response to each situation,
the Buddha established a precept to guide the behavior of the sangha in the
future. While bhikshus (fully ordained monks) follow precepts that were
established due to unwise behavior of the monks only, bhikshunis (fully
ordained nuns) follow the precepts that arose due to inappropriate behavior of
both monks and nuns. Also, some of the additional precepts relate only to
female practitioners. For example, it would be useless for a monk to have a
precept to avoid promising a nun a menses garment but not giving it!
Personally speaking, as a nun, having more precepts than a monk
does not bother me. The more numerous and the stricter the precepts, the more
my mindfulness improves. This increased mindfulness aids my practice. It is not
a hindrance, nor is it indicative of discrimination. The increased mindfulness
helps me progress on the path and I welcome it.
In short, while Western nuns face certain difficulties, these very
same situations can become the fuel propelling them towards internal
transformation. Women who have the inclination and ability to receive and keep
the monastic precepts experience a special fortune and joy through their
spiritual practice. Through their practice in overcoming attachment, developing
a kind heart, and realizing the ultimate nature of phenomena, they can benefit
many people directly and indirectly. Whether or not oneself is a monastic, the
benefit of having nuns in our society is evident.
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This article is taken from the book Women's Buddhism, Buddhism's
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